Women, Life and Freedom in Kurdistan, International Day to End Violence Against Women

"Millions of women and girls around the world are assaulted, beaten, raped, mutilated or even murdered in what constitutes appalling violations of their human rights. [...] We must fundamentally challenge the culture of discrimination that allows violence to continue. On this International Day, I call on all governments to make good on their pledges to end all forms of violence against women and girls in all parts of the world, and I urge all people to support this important goal."

Secretary-General Ban Ki-moon


Message for the International Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women


25 November 2012

Women's activists have marked 25 November as a day against violence since 1981. This date came from the brutal assassination in 1960, of the three Mirabal sisters, political activists in the Dominican Republic, on orders of Dominican ruler Rafael Trujillo (1930-1961).

Today, the International Day for the Elimination of Violence, is a day to remember those women who have fallen victims of violence. Here in Iraqi-Kurdistan, women know violence very well; they are killed in honor related violence, as a cleansing for family’s honor. That is acceptable in Kurdish society, dominated by patriarchal and tribal customs.  If a woman is a “bad woman”, she is to be killed; the problem is that being a bad woman means not submitting to local customs of early or force marriage, or even being raped.

Today, in Suleimaniya, in Iraqi-Kurdistan, women, men and children gathered to hold a memorial for those women killed in honor related violence, among them Mamosta Sakar (28) and Nigar (15), killed earlier this year. Suleimaniya, in one hand is one of Iraqi-Kurdistan more progressive cities, with a lot of women advocating for freedom and equality, on the other hand it has to deal with one of the highest incidence of honor killings.

Memorial for Kurdish women victims of honor killings

Children were also speaking out against violence

 The memorial testified to the continuous women injustice in the form of rape and murders. Men stood around looking at the names laying on the floor besides flowers and women shoes. Holding banners and pictures on the street, people stopped Suleimaniya’s main street traffic for a couple of minutes, chanting “ Women, Life, Freedom” and “ Stop the Killing of Women”. One of those caught in traffic yelled: “Four women are worth one man”.

On the sidewalk, some children also gathered holding the pictures of the women murdered and even a little girl, maybe a year old joined them, holding in her little hands the picture of Mamosta Sakar as if saying: I am protesting the killing of women, I want to have my rights when I grow up. The event closed with participants letting free white balloons on to the sky, symbolizing the white ribbon campaign. 

Women and men stopped traffic on Suleimaniya's Main Street to demand the end of women killing and freedom and respect for women. November 25th, 2012

My voice counts, stop killing women in Kurdistan.
Photo by Johanna Rivera, People Development Association, Suleimaniya, Iraqi Kurdistan

A baby holding a picture of Mamosta Sakar, murdered by her father in the village of Sarkapkan on Feb. 5th 2012
Photo by Johanna Rivera, People Development Association, Suleimaniya, Iraqi-Kurdistan

The White Ribbon Campaign (WRC) is the largest effort in the world of men working to end violence against women (VAW). In over fifty-five countries, campaigns are led by both men and women, even though the focus is on educating men and boys. Photo: Johanna Rivera

Women rights organizations that organized this event are part of Zhiyan Group, a group that was formed in August 2012 with more than 60 organizations that are advocating against honor killing in Kurdistan.

How long are we going to keep silence and be complicit against the killing and violence against women?

From peace at home to peace in the society

Bahar Munzir, reading the press release about the activities in the International Day to End Violence Against Women. The activities will be running for 16 days.

Laying One Brick at a Time, Taking One Step at a Time

Suleimaniya, Kurdistan, Iraq, April 13, 2012

"People say: What is the sense of our small effort? They cannot see that we must lay one brick at a time, take one step at a time." Dorothy Day

I when I feel overwhelmed by the things I experience here, I ask myself: What is the sense of my efforts?. Sometimes I cannot see that small bricks are necessary to build a wall.

Today at the [Qalawa] camp was very hard. It was hard to get the kids attention, they were not following instructions, and sometimes I get very frustrated when things don't come out as I expect. I forget that the real reason to be there is not to be successful.

Today, I spoke to one of the woman in the camp that has a disabled child. As she told me about the child's condition, my heart was immersed in deep sadness. The young mother was fixing a button in the boy's pants and telling me he can't see, or walk, or talk. I felt helpless at such a reality, and could just listen to her talking and looking at her child. The boy's hands were so beautiful and perfect, as if to compensate for the rest of his body's handicap.

I suddenly realized that every week we come, the kids are still there, living under the same deteriorating conditions as the last week. I had the thought that what we do is not changing anything in the lives of these children. What I cannot see is that everytime we go, the camp's air feels different; special. Every family welcomes us, greeting us with a smile. I like their simplicity and the respect they show us when they invite us to share whatever little they have. I find myself very close and comfortable around them.

As Robert Fisk said last week in a lecture in Erbil: "What people really need is not  democracy, but justice and dignity." And I think this is exactly what we have failed to do here in Iraq; while bringing "democracy", we have stripped the Iraqi people from justice and dignity.

In the meantime, and despite my own frustration, I echo the words of Mother Theresa: "The miracle is not that we do this work, but that we are happy to do it".

PS. I never put pictures of the kids in order to protect their identity and dignity, but thought these don't show their faces and wanted you to have a sense of what our days look like.

Amir explaining the rules of the game to the kids, actually this day was very successful and the kids enjoy this game that consisted of putting some dirt in a cup that had a small hole in the bottom, then running to the other side as fast as they could to bring as much of the dirt to the other side. The team with most dirt wins, actually both teams won!

After the day activities, everyone was full of dirt and fun!

The kids never want us to leave after the day activities are over, we are super tired and they ready to continue!!!

Something to think about on Thanksgiving, Suleimaniya, Iraqi, Kurdistan

It has been more than three months since my last post. In that time, many things have happened here in this part of the world: the PA went to the UN to ask to be admitted as a member state, Arab Spring has become the Arab autumn and now the Arab winter, thousands of Syrians have been killed, Egyptian Christians have been massacred in Cairo, Gilat Shalit was exchanged by 1027 Palestinian political prisoners, 24 Turkish soldiers were killed in near the Turkish-Iraq border (Turkish territory) which led to air and land strikes in Northern-Iraq, Kurdistan, Muammar Qaddafi was murdered. It seems that violence is business as usual.

Perhaps I didn’t have the will to write, I was sick, very frustrated, overwhelmed or even disappointed. After a year in Kurdistan, nothing seems to have changed. Life goes on, people in the west and even here go to work, and they are busy with everyday things. In the meantime, I try to keep myself motivated and find a reason to wake up in the morning; to believe that there is hope for change, a reason to keep fighting for justice, in a far away country, removed from all the things that I love: my family, my friends, my country. Sometimes I find it hard.

Every morning and afternoon, I walk to work and pass by a group of old Kurdish men (Kakas) that greet me and invite me for a domino match, I have even beaten them a couple of times. I walk on the neighbourhood, absorbed on my own thoughts. I go to work and the day goes by seating between emails, reports, forms, meetings and trainings. Then the weekend comes and the story repeats itself. This doesn't make sense. Seems like if I were working for nothing, as things don't seem to change.

Suddenly, Friday morning, my day off, I go to a very special place. A place that is hard to explain, a place where love and misery coexist. Here, I realize why I am here, when I see the face of the children I get to work with every Friday, they are Iraqi children internally displaced by violence. Their eyes are so beautiful, full of laughter, full of joy, despite the hard conditions of living as refugees in their own country. When they come running and I hold them and see how full of love they are, I can’t but remind myself how lucky I am to be there and get to enjoy this time with them. We play, sing, dance, and learn together. The other day, I taught them the Macarena, I wish you could see how their small bodies danced to the rhythm of the music. For a single moment I lost sense of where I was, and just enjoyed their laughter. I forgot they are children of war and violence, displaced, fragile. I get back to reality, most of them must have spent the majority of their lives in this forgotten camp, a place of uncertainty and misery. Now every single week, they are asking to dance the choreography they learned. Even if we don’t have the music, I will sing for them and they do the steps. We have so much fun together. Then when is time to leave, everyone is sad, but we just look forward to next week.

Yes, this happens as you live a different life, go to do your groceries, to the salon, to the post office or for your daily walk. According to the UN Refugee Agency, there are 27.3 million internally displaced refugees around the world, the majority of them women and children, Iraq being the third largest country with internally displaced people (IDP), between 1.3-2.8 million, after Sudan and Colombia. Although internally displaced people outnumber refugees by more than two to one, no single UN or other international agency has responsibility for responding to internal displacement. As a result, the global response to the needs of IDPs is often ineffective. And guess who paid for the wars that created these refugees? You, with your tax dollars! And who is paying now, for programs to help refugees? Again, you with your tax dollars. And who should be accountable for these millions of people who now are homeless, I leave that for you to answer. Desmond Tutu said that those who are silent to injustice can be called complicit.

Last week, it rained on the camp, for a full three days, I could not think but how where the kids and if they were warm enough. When we arrived, there was mud EVERYWHERE, but the kids didn't care, they were waiting for us. We always take our shoes off to keep the tent clean, but this time it was needed much more. I found myself lifting up the smaller kids who where struggling to take their muddy boots off. It was a beautiful Friday, a beautiful muddy Friday.....

One of the kids pair of muddy shoes

So, when you are eating your Thanksgiving dinner, and are giving thanks, be thankful for all the blessings you have: a warm and safe home, food, water, electricity; think about the people: especially internally displaced women and children, who have nothing and yet are thankful for the little they have.

Amir's shoes on the tents entrance